Narcissists EASILY walk away — HERE'S WHY?

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More on Asperger's Syndrome:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YL8Uw3anjLo&list=PLyMzTz301QVx4DyktIi5OBPlP8c03LfF-
More on Narcissism:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CadnytkqDKk&list=PLyMzTz301QVxr0yvW47ev6l8m1jPKagbO


You have a strong friendship or love relationship with another person. That person, however, walks away with no sign of remorse. And, what's more, the person you thought was a dear friend or love of your life, begins to attack you through a smear campaign.

You are blown away. How could he or she do such a thing?

1. No sense of connection

Stop and think about what is in your trash can at this very moment. Chances are, you have no sense of connection to anything you have discarded and, chances are, you never did have a sense of connection. My trash bin is full of soda pop cans. You are no more valuable to the narcissist than a soda pop can.

2. Transactional relationship.

Covert narcissists don't have personal relationships.
The narcissist views you with the same affection as they have for the plumber. Once the plumber has completed his job, he's no longer needed and is discarded.

3. Unloving relationship.

Sure, you are friendly with the guy who sells you a car, but once the transaction is closed, you are out of his or her life.

4. No sense of obligation

The narcissist has no sense of obligation to you are anyone else. I've known narcissists who are so extreme, they spend their adult lives being evicted because they have no sense of obligation to pay rent. They have no sense of obligation to you. And so they easily discard you without a second thought.

5. Hidden persona

Narcissists are "double-minded". By that I mean they straddle a fantasy world and the real world. In their fantasy world, they are the most intelligent, valuable, wonderful person on earth; a king or queen lording over their kingdom.

Once you catch on and establish boundaries, the narcissist knows it's time to leave. And to defend their illusion of self-grandeur, they will ratchet up the smear campaign to make you appear to be the villain and they the victims. You, they will say, are the problem. You are the reason they left.

6. Scripted personality

So, one of the reasons a narcissist finds it so easy to walk away from you is that nature has programmed them to do so. It's much the same as nature has programmed a spider to spin a web to catch and devour prey, then discard the web as they move on elsewhere.

7. No affective empathy

Covert narcissists don't care because they can't care. Caring is not a part of their psychological profile. I own a pickup truck that has no air conditioner. I can't turn on the air because there is no air to turn on. The narcissist has no 'care conditioner.' He or she can't turn on the care because there is no care to turn on..

8. Unawareness of their flaws

All that matters is supplying themselves with ego-boosting relationships that support their fantasies of self-importance. Walking away from you is easy because they don't -- or can't -- see it as a flaw.

9. A matter of goodness

In the covert narcissist's fantasy, he or she is simply too good for you. But in reality, the narcissist knows that they are NOT good enough for you and, in reality, you are too good for them. And so they leave.

10. Unloved or never a friend

Unloved applies to a romantic relationship. But the covert narcissist knows his or her victim fell in love with the fantasy they portrayed, not the real person. The narcissist knows his or her victim befriended the fake personality they presented. You fell in love with the character, not the actor. Deep down inside, the narcissist knows he or she is a conniving, dishonest individual that is undeserving of affection. And so the actor walks away from the stage with no remorse. It was, after all, just a show, just a set; just a performance.

When the narcissist walks away, let him or her go. And then, if possible, stay away. In my experience, the single most effective method of managing narcissists is to avoid them.